Category Archives: estranged

I, Jackass

For many years I have striven to hide my intelligence. In my experience, people seem to mistrust those that are smarter than them. I should quantify my usage of the word ‘smarter’. It is just the best word that I … Continue reading

Posted in awkwardness, BekHobbes, confused, depression, estranged, existence, hope/despair, humanity, loss, love, memories, opinion, questions, reallife, sorrow, suicide | Leave a comment

Secret Squirrel’s Avoidance (plus random poem)

Someone recognised me the other day. Somebody I went to school with, twentyish years ago. This surprised me because I didn’t recognise him. And because he looked so old. Maybe ten years older than me. Not that I am old. … Continue reading

Posted in avoidance, awkwardness, BekHobbes, confused, depression, estranged, existence, humanity, loss, memories, opinion, poem, poetry, questions, reallife, sorrow | Leave a comment

Last Christmas

I really feel that this might be my last Christmas. I hope so. I am just so tired of everything. I am getting too old for this. I will be thirty-five next year and I am still single, still alone … Continue reading

Posted in BekHobbes, christmas, depression, estranged, existence, hope/despair, loss, love, memories, opinion, questions, reallife, sorrow, suicide | 3 Comments

“…including other men”

Before she disappeared from my life, apropos of nothing, she said, “I can talk to other people, including other men.” Why apropos of nothing? Because I never once tried to stop her talking to anyone else, men included. I couldn’t … Continue reading

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Leper! Unclean!

I am the human equivalent of a wet wipe in that I am often flushed away when people are done with me. Am I being harsh on myself. Perhaps but I think I have just cause to think this. Finding … Continue reading

Posted in asexual, asexuality, BekHobbes, confused, Demisexual, demisexuality, depression, estranged, existence, hope/despair, loss, love, opinion, questions, reallife, sorrow, suicide, women | 1 Comment

Donald Trump, America’s Folly?

America has voted. And Donald Trump, much to the surprise of America and the world and Donald Trump himself, is President. Yup, Marty McFly failed to get the sports almanac back. So what does it mean? First, shushing all the … Continue reading

Posted in BekHobbes, DonaldTrump, estranged, hope/despair, opinion, politics, questions, reallife, society, sorrow, terrorism | Leave a comment

Stranger in a Strange Land

I have never felt like a member of the human race. I feel apart from it. It is as if there were some gulf between me and everybody else. But that is alright. That is more than OK. From what … Continue reading

Posted in BekHobbes, depression, estranged, existence, humanity, opinion, questions, reallife, sorrow | Leave a comment