Short Story Discovery

I found a cache of short stories that I wrote 25 years ago.

I was ten at the time. That awkward period between nine and eleven where existential dreads start roosting in your mind. So I wrote stories to help ameliorate the dread. Not sure it worked but as I am still alive, who knows.

I was thinking about blogging a few of them for no other reason than a cheap laugh. Also, I always like to invite public ridicule.

The titles are as follows:

1: The Adventure of the Brick in the Sock
2: The Grave Digger
3: The Man in the Fuck-Me Y-Fronts
4: The Rise and Rise of Terrance B. Drunke
5: Cacafuego
6: Fairy-Nuff
7: The Stiff and Wyle
8: Turkey in the Public Eye
9: Tight as Groan
10: Achtung!
11: The Id Couple
12: Motley Malcolm
13: M-Nineteen-Ecks-VW
14: The Fantabulosa “Bake Her” Boys
15: Hic Est Enim Calix Sanguinis Mei
16: The Fat Boy’s Limb
17: The Heavitree Rhythmic Tentacles
18: Suture
19: The Gnarliest Man
20: Egbert the Corpse and his Band of Merry Jack-O’Lanterns
21: Hallowe’en World
22: Irish Joe and Stan the Man
23: The Hellcat Devil Brigade
24: Brittle John (Zombie Thief)
25: Jub-Jub

Like I said, I was ten when I wrote these so gimme a break!

Number 24 was unfinished but I have the notes for it. I might write a stupid poem about the subject of the story.

Reading through them, some stand up (barely) and others I just look at and think “What the hell was I trying to do?”, but some are pastiches of other authors such as Charles Dickens (I bet you can’t guess which one if the Dickens or Edgar A. Poe (again I bet you can’t guess which one that is).

I was very clearly under the influence of Douglas Adams which is either a compliment or an insult to his name. Also, note the Mervyn Peake pun in one of the titles. I was one well-read ten-year-old.

I have written short stories ever since I was seven-years-old. None of those exist thankfully but I recall writing about a man called Angelo Lenski and his time-travelling dinosaur egg.

I think I am one of those writers who write simply they love doing so. I have no wish to be published and, if any publishers read these stories, that wish will almost certainly be granted.

I will periodically blog maybe three or four of these stories this year or the next. You’ve been warned.

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About greebohobbes

All-round irritant, expert swordsman (loves lopping off the heads of ghouls), professional charlatan and outrageous wearer of black cocktail dresses...
This entry was posted in BekHobbes, fantasy, fiction, humour, memories, reallife, rubbish, shortstory, writing. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Short Story Discovery

  1. Karen Smith says:

    These sound really interesting. I look forward to reading them.

    Like

  2. Pingback: Story I Wrote When I Was Ten 1 | Random Shoes

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